The Postcards for Mom Pranksters

Thanks to the Post article and someone posting the link on a BNL website, we're over 700 subscribers to our monthly newsletter. That newsletter will be coming out next (holiday!) weekend with the July item.

BIRTHDAY IN JULY!

Much like Christmas in July sales, I propose we celebrate Mom's birthday in July. (Mom's real birthday is December 9th.)

So, Birthday in July! Try to get Mom a "Birthday in July" greeting by July 9th.

Or, a Belated Birthday in July through the rest of the month.

(No, this is NOT the special item. Will's still the boss around here :).)

Mom's mother, Meemaw and sister, Ruby left today to spend a week in Arkansas visiting Mom's grandmother, who they all call Aunt Ruby. So, mention some Ozark fun if you get the chance! Tell her you saw them somewhere.

Mom really likes shoes. If you've got anything with shoes on it I'm sure she'd love it.

As for getting me off the hook for being behind this -- help me convince Mom I don't know what's really going on here. I need some ideas. Here's where we are, and the ideas I have so far.

The Facts:
(1) I had to apply for the P.O. Box in my own name (heck! I needed 2 photo ID's!) Mom asked the folks at the Post Office who applied for the box and THEY TOLD HER!
Soooo..... She knows I got the box. Help me come up with a good story for WHY I got the box.

(2) I sent Mom the Barenaked Ladies CD to the P.O. BOX and stupid Barnes and Noble put my return address on it so she knows it's from me. Help me explain why I sent it!

(3) Mom sent a letter to me with the P.O. Box as the return address and told me it was for Martha and would I be a dear and forward it (I'll try to get it scanned this weekend :)) I want to call her and ask her about the letter -- but I need to feign confusion about why I got it. I'm going to ask her who told her to send it to me! I also need you guys to write some weird letters to me and post them here on the site so I can pretend I'm getting weird letters too that I don't know where they're from. Then I can grill her about why I'm getting these letters. (Of course, if Mom was as diabolical as Will she would put my return address on the letters she writes back to you guys and then I really would get goofy letters -- but that's another prank.)

(4) Also, I sent Mom some stamps and stationary to the P.O. Box. I'm thinking I could just deny this and ask her how the the heck people got my address to fake that! What do you think? I just figured if she was writing y'all back she would need some more supplies. Plus, who can resist sending their Mom 60 Kwanzaa stamps?

OK -- Thanks for the help. The more ideas the merrier!

Got a letter from Mom yesterday. With the P.O. Box as the return address. Addressed to Martha c/o Wendy Haas. I'll be sure to scan it later and send it to Will so he can put in the Gallery.

I guess this means Mom really knows I'm behind it (though I'll never acknowledge the letter.) It's still funny as long as Mom doesnt' know what IT is, right? What do y'all think?

Only a few more days to get those keys in the mail to Betty. Get movin'!

We've been featured in the Washington Times.

No news from Mom today, so I'll post news ABOUT Mom instead.

Some facts about Mom:

Mom went to college in Catawba, NC for one semester when she was 17. She's not entirely sure what she majored in, mostly she played bridge and has slumber parties.

Mom likes to sew.

Mom has traveled to Aruba, Maui, Bermuda and Niagra Falls.

Mom's mother, who we call Meemaw, can drive an 18-wheeler.

Mom and Dad like Santana.

Each Year, Mom likes to have a Miss America Party, where everyone must do their hair Miss America-style, wear P.J.s and vote on who will be in the top ten, immediately after each girl is introduced.

Mom's fishing nickname is "Chicken Wing".

Mom's first car was a 1981 or 1982 bright red Pontiac Trans Am named Big Red, The Winker.

Once, I asked Mom if she wanted to go on my spelunking trip for Girl Scouts. She laughed for several days.

I've started populating the Gallery. Take a looksee around.

It's also official - my Mom (Celeste) and her husband (Jim) have written two postcards to Betty, signing them Glen and Kay... so instead of mentioning Celeste, you may want to mention them... hehe...

So, it looks as if Ms. Betty Anne is playing along, and even writing back to some her prankers. While this is fun and cool, why not take this another step, and prank two people at once?

How you ask? Simple.

Write to Betty. But, instead of your return address, put a friend's. One that DOES NOT KNOW about this website, but someone you talk to often (preferrably). Include a few minor details about your friend (remember, as if your friend is writing to Betty). Assuming Betty writes back, she'll be writing back to someone who never sent her something in the first place. And she'll mention things that pertain to your friend (or, former friend!)

And, assuming your friend writes back to Betty saying 'you wrote me a letter using my name but I have no idea who you are', the prank will be even more crazy.

This could get outta control, real fast.

As for the letters that have come back, I'll post them this week in the Gallery. If you get a letter back from Betty, please scan me a copy or at least email me the text. Thanks!

HA! Now this is humor!

I saw Mom and Dad for a Father's Day brunch yesterday, and Mom couldn't stop giggling and talking about her mail. She loves it! She says she wants to write a book of short stories based on some of the scenarios in the letters. Here's a favorite excerpt from the conversation:

Mom: Actually, one of the letters was SO perfectly written, I think it may have come from Meemaw [Mom's mother, my grandma]

Me: Meemaw? Meemaw? When has she ever pulled a practical joke?

Mom (in a conspiratorial tone): She's sneaky. I think she has something to do with all this.

Hee! Well, clearly Mom hasn't put together that this thing has to do with internet, 'cause Meemaw's never been online in her life.

She thinks it's weird that people ask about Carl, Ben, Sunny & Chaz, but never Dad. So: Dad's name is Victor (a lot of people call him Vic) why don't you give him a shout out in your next postcard or letter?

Dad is officially "in" on the prank. He called yesterday to let me know that Mom received 13 postcards and letters on Saturday -- including one of a burro going down the Grand Canyon and one from Illinois of the World's Largest Ketchup Bottle.

Here's an excerpt from the e-mail Dad sent detailing his initial response to receiving the key to the P.O. Box in the mail:

"At first Mom and I were alarmed when she received a package that contained a strange card written in psychotic stalker script and the keys to a P.O. Box. Honestly, it frightened both of us. I examined everything closely and I asked her a lot of questions about any weirdoes she might have encountered in our area and who she thought might send her such a package. I became angry at the thought that some pervert may have targeted my wife and I vowed to find and punish the creep who was behind this thing.

"I immediately drove up to Clarksville to check the P.O. Box. I took Mom with me because I didn't want to leave her alone in the house. When I opened the P.O. Box, there was a ! card from Julie and the Bare Naked Ladies CD you sent Mom. In the pack age with the CD was a packing slip with your name and address on it which identified you as the customer who ordered the CD. So, we were relieved on one level, but then, because Julie's note talked about pulling a prank on her ex-husband and because I imagined that you could have written the letter and signed it "Julie", I was even more alarmed because I jumped to the conclusion that you might have gone insane!

"I told Mom to get in the car because I intended to drive to your house right then to find out if you were all right. Thankfully, Mom was calmer than I was and she convinced me to drive back home by promising me that she would call you as soon as we arrived. After Mom called you and you laughed in a manner that she described to me as "normal", she and I were finally able to relax.

"She still has no idea of what's really going on.

"Now, she is having a lot of fun with all of the cards she has been receiving. I can hardly wait to see her reaction when she begins to receive a virtual flood of cards in her mail box! I thank both of you and everyone else involved in this, very much."

Dad also said all the cards were very nice and kind -- so thanks everyone for remembering that this is my Mom!

More news will come as it trickles in :)

This is going to be a good week.

Every time someone requests "Mom's" address (in this case, Betty's), I get an email with their information, and usually a comment or note from them. On average, I get around 10 a day. I should also let you know that (duh) I'm an Internet junkie, and I check my email often. Between my business and the two postcard sites, I try to keep up on it so it doesn't get out of hand. I checked my email before retiring for the evening around 9PM last night. 4 new messages, nothing exciting.

This morning I got to work early. Work email, nada. Business email, nada. Personal email, jackpot! I had a ton of new requests. I knew something was up.

Todd Frankel called me early last week and said he was wanting to do another article in the Post, to follow up on all the mayhem I'm causing. He also mentioned that he'd be going out of town, and that he wasn't sure if he'd be able to get the article in the paper before he left.

Well, apparently he's back in town.

No wonder I have so much email!

So, welcome to all the new readers. Check this page every few days if you can, as this is where our updates will be posted. Our current Mom, Betty, lives somewhere in Maryland and doesn't realize that she'll be getting a postcard from you, soon. So go, write, and have fun.

But don't let her in on our little secret, eh?